OK.. so I was 17, graduated from high school and it was off to college. I went to a small private school to a HUGE Big 10 University. I was terrified and excited at the same time. My security blanket was gone... I am an only child, with a more than interesting childhood...being a way from home only gave me more time to think. Think about life. Think about my childhood. Think about where I had been and where I was going.... all I could do was THINK!!!
Many nights I lay up awake.. just thinking. I couldn't sleep. After awhile all I wanted to do was sleep. If I could only sleep then I wouldn't have to think. But I couldn't... I couldn't sleep! After many months of this, my sleepless nights turned to uncontrollable nights of crying. Crying under the covers trying not to let me roommate hear my sobs. Sleeping during the day missing class because I was so exhausted mentally from THINKING!
April of my freshman year I couldn't pretend to be okay anymore. I couldn't smile and wear a mask anymore. I was desperate... I needed help. I finally made my call for help... I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder. Ah, a label. So now whats the cure...
You see I am a TURTLE. I hide in my shell. It protects me. I am warm and cozy inside there....no one can hurt me. I don't have to deal with you, them or anyone.........
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